Does God Have a Phone Number?

Does God Have a Phone Number?

I want a telephone number to call God. I want His number because I need to ask a question. I need to know why I sustained a traumatic brain injury (TBI). On January 28th of 2004, my life changed forever.  Blinded by sunlight, I drove my snowmobile out onto a highway where I collided with a pickup truck. People came rushing to the scene to provide aid as I lay there with blood starting to pool around my head.  That day the truck forever changed my life.

I would ask Him:

Dear God,

I cannot handle this anymore. It does not get better.  Not in our family. I have a father who is consistently moody, a mother who is oblivious to my feelings, an older sister who has her own family and has her own diagnoses, a brother who makes ignorant choices  and gives no effort into things that do not benefit him, and then a younger sister who gives nothing and then says I have impacted her career choice. I am not even going to start on my extended family.  

I may look okay, but you know I am not. I am really hurting. I wish, everyday, that my life would come to an end. I  get blamed for everything.  I tell you I have my flaws but also have some key strengths that should never be bestowed to a person.  

My life before was not all sunshine and roses but I managed to live. I was the outcast then but it never really affected me. I had so much more to live for.  What do I, no have?

The suffering that I have bore should be taken into some consideration by you, God.  I miss my old life, who I used to be. I do not want to live my life in fear or depending on others.  I want to regain some normalcy.  These past 13 years have been a hellhole. So much fighting, arguments,  and disappointments.  I wish I could  understand God’s plan for me.

No matter how I analyze it; I cannot understand it. Please if someone has God’s phone number please leave it with me, I am drowning in my tears.

The anger, the lack of control, and the sudden impulses are all parts of my new self.  Can someone please understand that I have a TBI.  I want one thing; God’s phone number…